Two Days with My Grandmother

About a week ago my cousin passed away. My mother, my grandmother, my aunt, and I went to both the wake and the funeral. Obviously a somber occasion. You won't find too many people cracking jokes or not thinking about death. We sat near the back row and well, it gave a pretty good view of anyone coming in to give their condolences to the family and pay their respect to the dead.

One group that came in caught my attention, mainly because one of them looked very family. Then I realized I knew one of them. He was a friend and I say friend loosely since I hadn't spoken to him in years. My mother, on the other hand, recognized him immediately. She asked, "Isn't that S?"
I replied, "Yes."

My grandmother, having overheard my mother, quickly buts in, asking, "Who?"
Mom replies, "Oh he's so and so's son."
"What does he do?"
"He's a d_____."
My grandmother turns to me and says, "Do you know him?"
"Yeah, I do."
"Do you have his number?"
"No and we're at a wake!"
But of course it didn't stop there.

The next day after the funeral my grandmother and I walked to the car to grab our coats. She asked again, "Did S____ come?"
"No."

Then, that very afternoon as we waited for our flight, she turned to me and asked yet again, "So you don't have his number?"
"No I don't." I didn't bother asking who the "he" she was referring to was.
"You should talk to him, before it's too late."
I just gave her a look and laughed to myself. I said what I always say to her when she brings up the subject of my singlehood.
"Sure , . ."

Another time during the trip . . .
On the drive from the office to the hotel my family was talking about how potential guys to set me up with and got on the topic of "qualifications." Somewhere in that conversation I put in my input which was, "I want a tall guy."
"How tall?"
"Six feet?"
"You're never finding a guy."
"Looks fall away, waistlines expand, but a person's height doesn't really change."
They had no response to that.


FYI I said the six foot thing just to piss off my grandmother, not because the guy I date has to be that height or taller. Personally, I think that's just setting myself up for disaster.